Technology and Your Kids

So I declared on the show that my children will only receive cellphones when they are 16 and I will monitor their activity on their laptops very closely. Technology scares me!! I would like to delay the whole process as much as possible because I fear what will happen when they get cellphones. The number of pictures and videos sent in Whatsapp, dirty pictures linked to certain words on Google search all scare me to be honest. How do I protect my child from all that? I can only protect them when they are under my roof, but what they do outside of my home with their friends and families, exposes them to so much. Do I want them to learn this from me or from someone else? 

Patience shared that her son has a basic phone that he uses to call her and text her.  She said she feels safe because that phone has no access to Whatsapp or YouTube. But I highlighted that anyone can call him and speak to him still at the end of the day. No matter what we do, we cannot protect our children 100%

So what do we do?

We were both quite conflicted as to what is the right age to give a child a phone, so we looked up what experts say about children and technology.  This is from Joyce Marter, a Psychotherapist:

Verizon Wireless and Parenting.com conducted a survey in 2011 asking 519 parents with children ages 6 to 17 at what age did they or would they give their child a cellphone. 

• About 10% of respondents chose the ages of 7 - 9, 
• 32% opted for ages 10 -12 and 
• nearly 40% said they wouldn’t give their child a cellphone until he or she was age 13 -15.

What are the benefits to a child having a cellphone or device with Internet access?
• Being able to reach your child
• Knowing where your child is via a GPS tracking device
• Helping your child learn through educational applications
• Providing social inclusion in a technological age

What are the safety concerns?
• Vulnerability to predators on the Internet
• Access to inappropriate content on the Internet
• Susceptibility to cyberbullying
• The possibility your child could share inappropriate content via text, photo or video

How can you keep your child safe?
• Use the restrictions page and block some things like YouTube, Safari and iTunes. IOS devices (iPhone and iPad) have a restrictions configuration page in Settings -> General -> Restrictions. The following apps can be disabled: Safari, YouTube, Camera, FaceTime, iTunes, Ping, Installing Apps, and Deleting Apps. On this page you can also adjust the allowed content.
• Use a parental control app to block pornography. If you have an Android device, you can install a free app called Android Parental Control that does similar things to the iPhone restrictions page mentioned above.
• Restrict your child’s contacts (email, text and social media) to family and friends whose parents you know.

What are the social concerns?
• Alienation
• Cyberbullying
• Communication problems such as misunderstood messages

How can you combat these concerns?
Provide education and guidance about appropriate communication via technology, and set the following boundaries.
• When they can use it—for instance, not during school hours or after 8 p.m., not during social events such as family gatherings or play dates when they should be relating face to face rather than through technology.
• How much can they use it. I recommend less than two hours a day to reduce development of addictive/compulsive behaviors.
• Where they can use it—for instance, not at school or events related to school, religion or athletics.

 http://www.joyce-marter.com/blog/joyce-marter-blog/promoting-safety-wellness-in-kids-use-of-technology/

Educate them at a level that is developmentally appropriate about the pros and cons of technology. 

Be clear about the rules and the consequences for breaking them. Then trust your child to be responsible. 

Follow through with the consequences if the rules are broken. View your child’s mistakes as opportunities for learning and growth, and keep the dialogue going

Parents need to provide roots but also wings: Educate and set parameters, but allow your kids the freedom to learn and grow

This topic I leave to you parents, you know what works best for you

Till next Monday...be happy

#beingaparent